going with your flow.

moosic is my religion.

my stalkers.

tagboard

stringlets.

reminisce.

thanks.

Design: doughnutcrazy
Icon: morphine_kissed

Smile.

C O U N T D O W N

2009 and 9th Monthsary.

... so smile.

Labels: new blog, new year

One more time!

HIGH SCHOOL REUNION!

Woot. :)

So my friends and I met up at Starbucks: Paseo. First, it was Crie-Crie and I. She gave me one of her marshmallow treat thingy-ma-jig from her neighbour because she didn't want them. Haha. But it was actually quite good, although a bit messy to eat.

Then followed by Kim and Kayla.

Afterwards, Mae, Bruce, and Pia. We then talked, took a lot of pictures, and suddenly we got hungry. So we were off to Shakeys! IJ then came and we all ate our fill of food. Haha. Finally.

We went to BJ Avenue after eating to chill. But the chilling part didn't actually happen since we were all freaking camwhores and decided to take more freaking pictures. Haha. But it was hilarious, fun, and I missed it.

I missed everything.

Consequently, we went back to Starbucks and finally chilled and talked some more. Although, after the clock striked five, people started leaving, but not before some extra photo-taking session.

The ones left were Mae, Kayla, IJ, Bruce, and myself. We went to 7/11, then and hung-out before my dad got there. So after a few minutes, he did, and Mae and I had to go. We said our goodbyes and off we went to my pad.

We ate dinner there--because papa insisted since he was actually a really good cook--and we took pictures of the moon. But the moon hid behind some stupid grey clouds so we didn't get to get any good shots. Darn it. Haha.

After dinner, we went to her pad and ate buko pandan, blueberry cake, ube, and sweet corn Graham cake! Haha. Sweet tooth, out, yes? Haha. Then we walked around her village and I saw my classmate from before (who was also her cousin) Tom! Haha.

Mae wanted to make me ride the motorbike, but seeing I'm not exactly sure if we'll be safe or not--I was telling her that I didn't want to die like that. Haha. But she insisted so she tried to turn the engine on, but it consistently dies on her. Haha.

It was a sign that I shall live. 8D

But anyways--we went around some more, and I saw this guy who stalked me from before... Jaypee. Haha. He kept on staring at us. Creepy, tall kid. Haha. But anyways--then we went back inside her pad to watch some movies.

I went home around 10 PM.

When I got home, after an hour or so, I called Bee up... apparently, he was having this... er. Fireworks on his face. Haha! Yes. It was so scary hearing him yell, "ITAI" on the phone. I was screaming as well.

Then he gave the phone to Sam and we talked. Haha. I didn't quite hear her, though, because her mouth was probably too close to the mouthpiece. But it was so cute hearing her say that her brother's face looked funny and the blood on his nose looked like boogers. Haha.

My UNYT suddenly ended, though, so we didn't get to finish the conversation that much. I ended up texting him instead--but the unlimited calls and texts of Globe was suspended until the morning of the 1st day of the New Year so I was like...

Oh crap.

In our monthsary, I wouldn't be able to talk to him as much as I want to. *sighs*

And then, I kinda forgot that it was our monthsary on the 1st so he was making tampo to me. Haha. I kept saying sorry, and he told me I forgot about our monthsary twice already. I feel so ashamed. Grr.

So yeah, he called me and after that call ended, we texted again. Then I decided it wasn't enough, so I called him. Haha. After that call ended... I fell asleep.

Then while I was off to dreamland, which was around 2 or 3 AM, he still kept texting me. Haha. It was cute that he keeps on sending me "I love you." text messages. :)

"Hay naku, mummy!

If nag-break kayo niyan--

mapapatay siguro kita!"

"MUMMY! Ang sweet naman!

Hay naku! Tapos lagi mong inaaway!

Ang bad mo talaga!"

"... kinikilabutan ako sa kilig."

- Mae Rosqueta.

It's our 9th monthsary tomorrow midnight!

Lol, and here I thought it was our 10th.

Military shirt courtesy of Bee!
I miss you, Bumbum! <3

Labels: food, high school, reminisce, where

Crazy right now.

Lunch at Kanin Club with the Bernal / Macatangay clan. Haha.

So yeah. We were so freaking noisy in the restaurant. People keep on staring at us. Haha. Good times... good times. :]

After that, just walked around and I went to National Bookstore to ogle at Smoke and Mirrors but I was dead-broke. So nevermind. Then off back home where we did karaoke and shit. Haha. But anyways--my cousin and tita were off to Taguig again till the New Year's so we stayed till night time at the Vintage House for some last minute picture-taking.

Then we tried to play GTA: San Andreas, but the damn CD won't work. Haha. So Around 8 PM, I went home with my sister, Antoinette, and we noticed the stars again... and it was so pretty! It's like the sky opened up fully and the stars went out to play! And... it was just so pretty.

I'm speechless about it. So I took pictures. 8D

So I'm planning to try and give myself a break from thinking... but it's kinda hard considering--I don't know. Haha. I abhor emotions in a situation like this. So I will try until the vacation ends that... I won't feel anything.

BUT YAY. These are just words anyway, right? You don't have to believe everything I write. You know why? Because I'm a fiction writer... and I learned to lie.

Labels: family, food, here

Harder, pls.

OMG... I came.

Labels: orgasm

I'm in love with a--

--skater.

"Syaoran is like a kid, Sakura. When little kids are scared, they avoid the thing that's scaring them. He's afraid of losing you. He seems to think that if he can avoid you, then he doesn't have to feel scared."

- Taguchi, "I'm In Love With A Plumber".

Labels: book, fiction, thoughts

So. Um.

So... um. I can't really say anything today. I've been bored, but kept making plans to do for the rest of the two weeks that I'm free. Haha.

Might go to Bureau on the 29th for Big Fish! Hopefully I get the rest of the slots.

Er, so. Saturday could be interesting as well. Might go to Bel-Air to chill with Pia. :]

And there's this plan to go to Tagaytay with the HS crew. Hopefully, it pushes through.

Just missing my Bumbum.

Labels: alone, book, boredom, here

Ho, ho, ho.

It's Christmas in Santarosa.

Santa's hanging with the baristas.

And he said where's the coffee?

We said--there's no mooore~

*sings*

... Haha. Say what?

But anyways, it was a good day if not a little bit uneventful. It's Christmas: we ate a lot. We became jolly. We movie-marathoned the whole day. We sang carols. We opened presents. We came home and watched more movies. I came up and greeted everyone online. Bee called. Our call got cut because he didn't have load anymore.

I couldn't do UNYT so I called Globe what the problem was. They said they were postponing it till the next day. But I called Bee regardless and we talked for 40 minutes with the rest of my load.

Then I slept at 3.30 AM. :)

I kept laughing today. It was so weird. But... yeah. At least I was laughing.

Labels: bee, birthday, christmas, family, love

But why?

DREAM SEQUENCE

In a room filled with vintage pieces, my arms were wrapped around another man's waist as you watched from behind. You were playing your guitar and looking at me with those soft, baby brown eyes and I felt my heart constrict in my chest.

You said, "I'm just going out."

And my new man looked at you and nodded his head at your direction with a small smile. "Okay, man."

And when you left, my new man kissed me...

... it didn't feel the same like when you did it.

I tried to kiss back, really, but it didn't feel the same so when I pulled back I asked if I could go see if you were okay. He looked at me with eyes that were too young to actually understand what love is in a romantic setting.

So I left the room quickly. And I saw you on the couch just outside the room, still playing your guitar. I stood there in front of you and you stood up from your seat, leaving the guitar on the couch.

"Come on, let's talk first..." You said.

And you led me to a room and I saw the tears in your eyes. I broke down and cried, running towards you and flinging my arms around you.

"I don't love him, Bee. I can't risk of losing you."

/DREAM SEQUENCE

I woke up crying.

When I checked my phone,

I saw that he left me a text (12:53 AM):

I love you.

Labels: bee, dream

Severely insane.

It's bad if you do or take things excessively. So do it in moderation.

Now, consider this, young one. So many wisdom of which you partake in this world of mixed and mismatched. The perception of one you might consider of using into molding your life as it is, however it may be wrong.

Of romance and sweetened bittersweet, of which you yearn and crave. Dark, strong, and yielding. Layers and layers and layers of everything that has been a distraction and constricting for progress.

May it or may it be not the future.

Nay.

& she said:

When I wake up, I forget.

I forget how life was for me the day before.

And I had to remind myself over and over:

"He's there, he's there. Watch out."

And then I'll become dull once more.

& he said:

Maybe it's for the best.

Maybe I'm just too tired and worn-out.

Maybe, just maybe, it would be better--

if I go out and think. Then I won't have to remind myself,

every. single. day.

That she was there. Waiting. Just... waiting.

Hello novel, "Severe".

I would like to feed you my brain.

Labels: book, insane, inspiration, novels, thoughts

How many words?

Veronika Decides to Die.

I would understand how everyday, you would think of life as the same and would want to end it because it felt that way. I'm still in the following beginning pages, but I could see how much the book would impact me after I read it.

How one would think the future would end up and planning everything by course and how it would be done. How one doesn't want to find the sole purpose of living just because in the course of life, you'll think that it would be a mistake.

That life wouldn't be worth taking risks for. That life is just going to be dull. Expected. And planned.

Life isn't all that pretty.

But those little things that make you happy makes life all worthwhile. :)

Hello Christmas,

Won't you be happy this year?

君とまたあえる日々を。

Labels: book, sane, thoughts

Tower over me.

Friday afternoon was absolute stress. I got all my course cards (and OMG! Thank God Ms. Nesse was nice enough to pass me for Physics!) and I passed everything! Squee! I'm so happy. *grins*

But then my problem came after I finished enrolling Bee for the next term. I couldn't enroll myself because--yeah. My advisor and the registrar were pains in the arse. Seriously. But anyways--Craig, Myco, and Zy waited for me till 5-something then we were off to Paseo. We dropped the couple off, then Craig and I went to the hospital to visit his sick baby brother (aww!).

However, his parents came out and offered dinner to us. So we ate dinner at Kanin Club. Bee texted me that I should go with Roy and the others already to Sta. Elena for the Christmas party but--I was invited to the dinner and I couldn't say no!

So Bee called me up and I went outside--I saw mastaah Ginneh! But yeah--Bee just told me that he'll just pick me up around 11 PM. So I agreed--because he didn't want me to commute.

Then a bit of shopping with the Ecleo family... we saw ate Anna and the others! Haha. Wewt.

After that--we went back to the hospital and I took pictures of the baby Bred! :P

Then--before we were off to Starbucks to chill finally--we went to his place and got his eye drops. Haha. But I wanted to see his big arse shoe collection so I asked if I could see it~ and I did. Yes.

But anyways--we stayed at Starbucks for 3 hours or so before Sho picked me up. Bee was waiting outside in the car and I was--wala lang. Just missed him... I guess. :')

Then off to Sta. Elena~ most of the time I was there, I was with Sho, Ralph, and Rogie. They taught me how to play the piano and shit. But after that, Bee went up and he hung out with me. :)

So we were left alone. And within that span, people thought something went on--but nothing did... yet. Haha. So yeah, had some shots... had laughs and shit. Then--when Bee and Migs had to drop off ate Ginneh at their place, I talked to Sho most of the night. When Bee came back, they disappeared and they went skateboarding.

So before I followed, another round of shots and shiz. Haha.

I was supposed to take shots of the skateboarding scene, but what happened was--they left me and Bee alone again. Haha. So we... talked. Haha. Then the newly renounced couple came and asked for pictures--since they were finally together. Lol. Yay for Roy and Mickey!

We took couple shots. Yes, we did. Haha. A lot. But anyways--

After that, went to our rooms--cough--and yeah. Er. Haha. We wanted to take a shower, but yeah. Then Kyle knocked on our door--haha. And yes. But yeah. Haha. I can't say anything else rather than that. *sniggers*

After that--we finally took that shower, haha. And I fell asleep, kinda, on the bed but not really? You know? Because it was scary in that room with the wind howling heavily outside. I had this ominous feeling and I didn't like it one bit. So I went out the room and I felt a bit dizzy because I stood up too quickly.

Bee helped me and he brought me back to the room and took care of me until I fell asleep. *blushes*

And whenever I would wake up because of a certain urge, I'd feel him stroking either my face or my hair. Ugh, I feel so giddy. Anyways~ haha. Then we talked about stuff and then we noticed that the sun was already rising. Haha.

Then we talked about what was happening at the other room--haha. Or what happened, actually. And yes. That... and yes. Haha. So... yes. Haha. Kimochii. Haha. Then we heard noises outside! Haha.

At 4 or 5 AM, the maids were already awake. Good job. Haha.

So we cuddled under the blankets. Haha. Then finally... we fall asleep. And woke up almost at the same time around 9 or 10 AM. Then I took a quick walk around Roy's lot and then asked Bee if we could go on ahead so I can go to Uni for my enlisting and assessment.

So we drove towards my pad first and got my slip.

Then yay~ after an hour of waiting and shiz--I finally got enlisted!

Enlistmeeeent~ LOL. Now, I will be trouble-free this Holidays. Hopefully.

Really, I'm hoping. Haha.

But anyways, after that, straight back towards my pad so I can take a shower and change so my family and I can go to Sucat to visit my grandparents' grave. After the trip, went to my tita's house to eat dinner and watch some cable before going home.

A really, really tiring weekend... and it just started.

Labels: bee, bumbum bee um-ni cobra, christmas, giddy, good times, love, party, sleepover, soulja crew

Horse butt.

Hihi, so those guys planned to buy Christmas presents without us knowing, aye? Tsk, tsk.

Anyways--

Festival with Winston and Heinz. Shopping. 2k gone and I bought only gifts for my dad palang. KFC. Then met up with Martha, Cathy, Tacky, Alexis, Jerome, and Kaye. We watched "The Day The Earth Stood Still" and I kept screaming: "When's the kid going to die?"

Haha. Yes. I'm bitter with the kid.

I'm so tired and sleepy. Yes. Very.

Labels: chill, festival, movie, paranoia

For Bee.

So the day started not so much as a good thing since the dodgy end of the night before. However...

Things just got better. :)

And I was so bored so I took shots of myself--again. Lol. Like I always do when I'm bored, ye? And yeah, good times. Haha.

Labels: bee, boredom, love, photoshoot

Yes, I still do.

O HAI.

I missed you. :)

Stargazing was so much better with you there.

And yes, we must try that tent thing soon.

Yes? :)

Labels: bee, good times, love

Why must this happen NOW?

Well, it's a bit weird.

But everyone does have their moments every once in a while. Only... I do. A lot of times.

I had to re-do my whole case study because my original file got corrupted.

15 pages worth. Good job. :<

Bee called, though. He asked how I was--concerning my sanity. Haha. Because without people like Bea, Rob, and Alexis... well. I don't know. :)

Labels: stress

Nag, nag, nag.

You know--

--I don't know. But yeah.

I edited my paper today for INTROSO. And... went to mass around 6.30... and then. Yeah, bought ice cream.

I think that's about it.

Oh, and the occasional camwhoring by the room. Haha. So yeah.

Haven't spoken to Bee--

since yesterday, hm. :(

Added note (9:40+ PM):

Bee texted! XD

Called him around 11 PM.

Labels: boredom, here, stress

Two more to go.

ADVERPR campaign shit.

We had to present our shit to the panelists. Haha. Really, no energy whatsoever--especially Bee since he didn't even sleep! Afterwards, he drove me home to get my interpretation and he checked up on my dad (since he had an episode earlier). It's good that my dad's okay now... a bit. I worry a lot so... gr.

Then we ate out at the Sizzling House for lunch. He drove me back to school and even though he can actually leave already (since I feel like I need to pee) he asked if he could stay with me for a few minutes longer.

... :')

I don't know when we'll see each other again (although, he did say that he'll be there on Tuesday) but I know I'll miss him... a lot.

So yeah. Then after the exam for ARTMSC, which I cheated on, unfortunately... Alexis dropped me home so I could sleep. And sleep was good. Really, really good. I woke up at 6 PM, and then chilled for a while before actually having the energy to stand up and prepare myself for the party.

Alexis picked me up and we picked up Cat afterwards. Off to Paseo to get Marmie and Tina as well, then to El Cielito Inn! Paaaaaarty! Then Starbucks for an after chill. I was so sleepy so I wanted to go home early. For once! Haha. Home by 3 AM.

Happy 18th birthday, Joshee (although your birthday is on the 16th)! Hope you had a good one!

Addendum

12 MN = Happy birthday, Jordiee~

haha, I didn't know you read my blog.

*sweat drops*

Side note

Paul is a serious pervert. LOL!

Labels: bee, chill, debut, party

A week to go.

Cram, stress, and everything in between today.

BASPHOTO scrapbook and finals = phail.

Foodtrip for a moment at Jollibee, National Bookstore to buy my illustration board, Starbucks for a quick chill, then off to Bee's house to do our ADVERPR shit. Really, it is shit. Ugh. I hate cramming something so hard.

And I envy Jordie and the others that they had a fun professor. :<

No sleep tonight?

Labels: bee, chill, soulja crew, stress

Crum-ing.

In a day, we shot 206 pictures. Wow.

My final Physics exam was today. Mhmm. It was okay. I hope I pass. :)

My partial exam for INTROSO was today too. I hope I pass that as well. :)

I went to Paseo with Bee to meet up with the rest of the crew. We stayed at Starbucks and James was there. Haha. That boob. Anyways, I took shots for my BASPHOTO thing. Shit. I have to cram everything again.

Afterwards, to Mc D's for dinner. We saw TJ! Yay! Haha. Then we took shots again.

Bee and I went to his place after and chilled there. He wanted me to relax so... Haha. I don't know why that's his definition of relax, but I actually became so relaxed that I... became hyper as well. Haha. Good job.

Oh yeah! I finally heard him play this song he's so crazy about right now on the piano. It was calming. :)

... I missed calm.

Thank you, papa...

for everything. <3

Labels: bee, good times, soulja crew

Hello happiness.

Where have you gone?

It seems so long since I've last seen you. I miss you, you know? Come back. I need you. I've been so imbalanced nowadays that I don't know what to do or say. It's been bugging me for so long already that I just... want... you... here.

So please.

Be here?

Today... Paul Junio raped me. Haha. During a shoot, that is. But anyways--I've been so stressed out lately... and I just need .6 to actually pass Physics. So I'll have to do great tomorrow! I can do this. Dattebayo!

I went to SM with Lexy, Pia, Craig, and Paul. We ate at the food court after Paul left us for his mummy (haha), then to Bel-Air to drop off Pia. We passed by Bee's house, though, so I decided to say hi. He wasn't there, though... so we went straight to Starbucks so Lexy can help me study for Physics.

But surprise, surprise.

Bee decided to visit me at Starbucks--that's why he wasn't home.

Then yeah. He drove me home, we stayed at the car to chill for a bit, then when I came inside the house... my dad surprised me with my Canon 1000D. Yay. I didn't have to go to Pasig anymore.

Haha. But now... All I'm thinking about is my INTROSO paper and my Physics exam tomorrow.

Wish me luck! :)

Labels: bee, here, tired

On wits end.

... and when I stop talking, I hope you miss it.

Every slip up, every rant, every laughter, every moan, every fear, every speech that comes along with it.

Because someday, I'll have the urge to stop.

And when I do...

... I hope you'll miss me.

I think I've been a good girl. Even though, I'll always curse at people... and have the urge to break the rules every once in a while. I think I've been good. Santa, won't you visit me this Holiday? Take me with you.

I'll be a good little elf. I'll help you clean your sleigh, make little toys for little girls and boys, and bake cookies for those who're tired of the work. I'll be taller than the rest of the elves but that's fine, right? I can help them reach higher places, I'll give them piggy back rides when I'm not too tired, and I'll play with them.

Like I would with my sisters before.

Oh, how I miss the good old days, don't you?

When I would write letters to you before Christmas day--

Dear Santa,

Please give me a doll for Christmas.

I've been good. Really! And help my family.

Okay?

Thank you.

--and give it to my mama for her to send it to the post office. And every Christmas, I'll get what I want. I'll thank my mum and my dad, then pray to God to tell Mr. Santa: "thank you". I'm a grateful little girl.

When I get something, I'll cherish it as long as there's reason why you gave it to me. But really, I'll keep it nonetheless. But one day, those times have passed and things have changed. Every night, I would ask God why I would cry.

Why I would feel pain on my backside. Why I would hurt inside.

And I would stare on the floor where an unmoving belt lay. I'll stare at it... long and hard. It wouldn't move. But I know it's the one. I knew it.

And when I would run away, I'll always come back. From the bitter cold, I would seek my home's warmth. But it wasn't enough. Mr. Santa... why did things go awry?

Now, I'm old and I know better... I'm still too young. Does that make sense? Because for me, it does. And I'm desperate to understand. I cry too much. Too... much. And it's not good for me anymore, Santa. No, it's not.

I'm a big girl... and I should understand.

But I don't. So I cry.

I... cry.

Dear Santa,

Won't you visit me this Christmas?

Just one hug and I'll be fine.

Just to know you exist.

And all those letters I sent you--

were not really ignored.

Thank you.

Labels: heartbreak, here, sane

Don't forget?

And I try so hard not to,

but you'll have to help along the way.

Tell me what your worst fear is.

And you say it's losing me.

The worst case scenario.

Mental torture. I've endured so much of that during my stay on this Earth. Everybody, if you ask them, really... they've known me as the girl who always smiles. The girl who would always greet you when you pass by the hall. The girl who cares for everybody in general.

I am the girl you would see always with a crowd of people--just to keep them happy. It's been a rough year. But even though a lot has been going on, you'll see me smile. Because... isn't easier to hide all those pain through smiling? People can easily relate to that.

Suffer silently, smile always.

My best friend had always quoted that statement. And it's true. Definitely true for people like us. But I don't want that anymore, because it's hard. I know of this guy... he is loved by everyone. He has the looks, the style, the easy-go-lucky personality, the charms to woo women easily... but he has a weak heart.

And he hides himself through playfulness. Through ignoring pain and centering himself to more happier things... and through, eventually, not caring for the hurt and problem at all. Because that's where he sees himself surviving such a life.

Because through perfection--there's always a flaw underneath the thick barrier. In other words, it simply does not exist. And he had to accept that, but at first, he couldn't.

And when he learned to actually apply that thought to his life, he lost himself. Those words he lived by before? Those started to fade from his life. And he needed to live by another wording, but with hardships.

Because, really... what is life without learning to survive through trials?

You just can't ignore problems because you don't feel like facing them. No. How are you going to grow? How are you going to mature? How are you going to protect yourself from bigger troubles in the future?

You'll just have to suck it up and learn.

And I learned.

But just like him... I learned to live by my own rules. And I started to yearn for independence. I didn't want to care for anybody else but me. I cared too much... and sometimes, I couldn't even ask for anything in return, because I want them to give it to me freely.

It's a wrong thought, because people are selfish. Sometimes, you'll have to demand for it.

And yet, I wait.

... I've waited long enough.

I can't say, "okay" all the time. Because... it's not. Everything's not okay. But you know? It's hard to say so. Haha. I don't have enough guts to say so.

I'm not strong enough yet.

So... yeah. Keep stomping on me. It's okay.

I'm a strong girl. I think I can handle a little bit of shitty treatment now and again. However, don't wait for me to explode...

... you might just regret it.

Labels: sane

I'm a big girl.

Raymond's birthday party: part two and my welcome back party at Tierra Nueva!

After being late for my ARTMSC class for an hour, I went straight to Alabang with Patrick and Vya. We went around ATC first and ate at Mc D's for some early dinner (since I figured that it might become more of a drinking session than a party, really). There's a McCafe now! I was like... shocked. Haha. Mc D's became prettier and they had jazz as background music! Woo!

I saw Darren, Dennis, and the others again at Mc D's! Haha. A lot of hey's and we miss you's exchanged. I miss those guys.

Then I went to Mindanao Drive with Patrick afterwards (thank you for the sundae!). I showed Patrick where I lived before. I miss my hometown. *sighs*

After, off to Norman's place to meet up with Francis. When I came there, I got hugs from Julien, Darren, and Francis. Aw. Now, all we waited for was Kyle. Chino and the rest where gonna come anyways (I know so cos I was there!) but Francis and Raymond went on ahead at Tierra Nueva.

We rode the tricycle until Ayala corporation then walked over to Tierra Nueva. It was a fun walk. Haha. Gabriel, Jed, Julien, Chino, and Kyle were with me so we had a lot of laughs while walking. The usual teasing and shit with Julien. That bastard. Haha.

Then we reached the house the party was held at! Haha. I met a few new people. Thanks Elton for the really tasty vodka mix and for Owen for the baked mac. Awesome food and drinks. Haha. I got kinda tipsy at first. But yeah--then Ryan came. Haha. I miss that old fart. We talked decently (I was like whoa! Really?) and I just remembered my Manresa days. Hm.

During the party, they kept asking me where Bee was. Really, I wish Bee was there. Would've been fun if he met my friends. My best guy friends ever. Really. I was hoping he would call... everybody was looking for him. *sighs*

Anyways.

When we were off to home, we went to Mc D's first (since it was 24/7 in Alabang anyways!) and we ate some more. Haha. We talked and blehrg. I love just hanging out with them idiots again. It has been awhile since I felt like... well. A dude in a chick's body. Haha.

They were teasing me that my body just became more curvier--but I still acted like the twelve year old Anne they knew and loved. Haha. But really--I changed. And they should have noticed that. I don't flirt with them anymore and shit like I used to. So...

... they should protect me from guys like Jondel, really. *sighs*

So yeah, when we reached Kyle's house already, the only people left were Kyle, Julien, Gabriel, Ryan, and me. We talked and reminisced. We jammed and Ryan kept shouting because he was losing on Bomberman. Haha.

We remembered how Raymond was so hung-over me before that he was so scared to ask me out because my gramma scolded him once. And the worst thing was he let Kyle do all the talking and defending. Haha. And Carlo--being a pervert and stuff--kept giving me massages and Ray would get angry. Haha.

And when we had this drinking session before, Ray and Carlo got in a fight over me. Haha. Memories.

I was already sleepy after a while, though, since the sun was rising and it was close to 6 AM. So it was sleepy time for us. I slept in the room with Julien and Nico at the top of the bed, and Gabriel and I at the mattress below them. It was soooo cold. Like freezing cold. Brr.

So I woke up around 11 AM. After that, a quick jamming session with Julien and Gabriel. Breakfast in a while, then Kyle, Gabriel, and I went to the park to hangout. There were a lot of things that changed.

I couldn't even imagine that a lot did while I was away. I miss Alabang.

... anyways, then we went to Grace's computer shop and dropped off Gabriel, since Julien wanted to play Special Forces apparently. Kyle and I hungout at his pad. But I wanted to take a shower, so I did. After I did, I regretted that I got a really small towel because when I emerged from the shower--since majority of that house are men--I was scantily clad and half-naked.

Good job, me.

Lol. But yeah--when I ran inside the room, Nico was there playing the guitar. His reaction was funny, though. But I was thoroughly embarrassed. Really. Err.

After all that, Kyle and I went to Chino's pad and hungout for a while.

... but for that while, I wished I could stay a bit longer because I already had to go to Cuenca to check out my sister's football game. My dad and his friend were with me there, but I wanted to go shopping.

I didn't have money, though. So I couldn't.

During my stay there, I was dizzy and I kept on tripping. I think I was hungover, but I promised Joji I wouldn't be. OMG. But maybe I wasn't. Maybe... it's because there were just too many people. Hm.

But anyways. Yeah. Mc D's again before going home, then we passed by Carmona and...

And... I just missed Bee, really.

Real-lationships.

They're hard to find.

Hard to maintain.

I see so many couples breaking up nowadays.

I see myself wondering why it's like that. It's the Euletide season... why must we let emotions control ourselves into ending something that can be worth saving and worth actually--letting itself grow into something more.

Bigger than just a boyfriend-girlfriend relationship.

Family. It's about spending time together and just... forget all about those boundaries. All those problems and obstacles that a couple must face together. A relationship is like family... you just can't give up that easily without a fight. Divorce--think it through.

When you think about it, though... it is quite easier to just give up. Let life take its toll on you and let everything flow as it's supposed to.

But... what is love without a little hardwork, aye?

Labels: alabang, chill, hangout, party

Beautiful things gone wrong.

Cos it's written in poetry--

that we're meant to be,

just you and me--

together for eternity.

A lot of shit has been happening to me lately. I know that I'm slowly failing my classes. I haven't been attending shit since the term started. I've made a lot of people cry--most especially those people I love dearly--and it hurts me to think so. I have failed people... and most especially I've failed myself.

And I want to redeem myself from this failure! I shall stand tall! Christmas is near! It's the Holiday I've hated the most before, but I want to learn to love it. God, help me learn to love it.

Help me to not become lazy until this term has ended. Help me pass everything... just. Help me. :<

I am now currently obsessed with:

D J T I E S T O.

I wish Big Fish will get him next time!

So today--I crammed a document paper for Fedora Studios with Bee. Haha. We went to CDBS and got their pay of P5k. Although, it is quite small as a starting capital for them... it's alright. It's just the beginning! Yay! I can't wait for their business to blossom.

I'm so proud of Bee. :)

And afterwards, he treated me out to Brother's Burger! Aww!

He took me home early, but it's okay. I get to bum around and read more manga. Haha. I'm so tired now, though. Not doing anything productive can do this to a person. Hm. I should start writing again. I miss the high of writing and anticipating reviews afterwards. I miss everything.

... holidays. I promise. I'll try and start with my writing again.

Labels: bee, chill, date, home

Cos it's silly.

... when you cry for the silliest of reasons.

Dying has always been an issue to me, and clearly--I'm not over that mentality. But anyways--today was a really hectic day. I skipped class again--and I really should stop--for my Physics report. Bee was so uber sweet to help me out and drive me to Paseo as well as back to school.

Afterwards, a little grocery shopping and off to his pad where we chilled. We listened to classical, jammed, listened to more music, checked the net, and played this game. Haha. It was cute.

When I was already off to my place, we hung out outside for a while and supposedly stargazed. But we ended up roleplaying shiz on the road. Haha. We wanted to go streaking, but there was curfew and we might get in trouble if the guards sees us. Haha.

But really... I want. LOL.

Then we chilled at my place--since the guard, for the nth time told us to--and talked.

*sigh* It was relaxing, indeed. Less than sign & three.

Labels: bee, chill, hangout, love

Holidays, pls?

Final lab exam for Physics today! I actually had fun. Haha. :)

Afterwards, off to Don Bosco to get the Fedora Studios' (Bee and Roy) down pay for their services. Then--Alabang again! Haha. It's amusing how it seems like I'm there most of the time nowadays. But anyways--we went to ATC and met up with Mickey. We went to DigiPrints firstly, then afterwards, for some late lunch at Brooklyn Pizza.

I had pesto. Yay.

Then--went to the park in the middle of the plaza and watched as Bee and Roy played. Haha. It was so cute. They were like kids, really. Haha.

Anyways, then we watched Four Chrismasses. It was a cute movie. Really. Haha.

After, we went to BF Homes to drop off Mickey for her tutorial session. Off to Festival, then! But before that, we kinda got lost in the village. Haha. But it was alright... we noticed before it was too late. Haha.

We went around Festival, then, and waited for Roy's ride to Pampanga. When he left, Bee and I went to his pad already.

We hung out. He gave me a really good massage. And then--we jammed. Haha. And tried out something new... and weird. Haha. We wrestled and reddened flesh! Haha! I am a vampire now, aye. *grins*

... now I'm tired. Like really, really tired. But I still have to do my Physics. And I have to help Bee with his papers as well. Hmm.

Labels: alabang, bee, chill, good times, hangout, love

I hate...

... word vomits.

I just hate them. Absolutely with all my heart and soul. They ruin everything. Well, actually... I just have to learn how to think before I speak. Really.

Anyways, today. Bee came home from Makati! Yay. :)

I missed him terribly. :(

He PM-ed me that he wanted to eat lunch out. So we did. But before all that, I gave him a treasure chest filled with sea shells and a poem for our monthsary! And he was like... aww! Then he was thanking me. But then when he told me I should put it in the compartment...

I saw a sign with: "My damn sexy girlfriend! Happy 8th monthsary!" or something along the lines of that--and a cow in a mug! And I was like squealing. And then, when I lifted it up... I saw two HUGE ASS lollipops! And I squealed some more! And I was like... AWW! Omg. ;A;

So freaking sweet! <3

But--anyways, haha. We had to go look for a place to stay at since he found out that I had class and we couldn't really go very far. Haha. But we still did--since Enchanted Kingdom was closed--we went to Alabang to eat at North Park. Haha.

And I got a cut when I tripped at the sidewalk. But Bee bought me bandaids... a lot. Haha. Then he put it on the cut and... it was so sweet. *cries*

And then afterwards, we went around ATC. We videoke-d at Timezone and then we had to go. But before that, we went to the music store first and bought some guitar strings. And then--we were off!

But he had to pee so we stopped by the nearest gas station and he bought me ice cream. And then--he drove like hella mad towards school cos I was already late for class. Haha. It was funny as. :)

Anyways, then we went to my pad so I can change clothes. When I was already at school, apparently, we had an exam. And I answered that difficult shit for 10 minutes when the rest of the class couldn't even finish it for forty minutes. Not trying to sound haughty, but haha... I just bullshitted everything, anyways.

And then fitness routines and shit. Afterwards, when I came back to the mirror room, I saw Bee and Kirk wrestling with big ass heavy pillows. And I was like, what the hell? Haha. It was so retardedly funny. But yeah--it was fun watching them.

Then Bee and I went to my pad so I can take a shower. Yay. Shower. And then off to his pad to do paperworks. Jordan came by, though, and then Bee went with him and I was alone at his pad for more than 30 minutes. But I didn't mind. Haha. He had cable.

And then when he came back--we cuddled. And... I just missed him. Really.

... Haaay. THEN the word vomit comes into play. Stupid sweaty eyes. LOL!

Labels: bee, bumbum bee um-ni cobra, chill, date, good times, home, love

On the seaside.

My Bumbum wasn't with me today for our 8th monthsary. Gods, I miss him. :(

Well, I went to Batangas with Hydee, Pele, Kevin, and Paps. Ocean Drive at Anilao, Batangas, to be exact, for our Travel Log shoot. Haha. It was uber fun. Around 2 PM, we went to the Sumbrero Island across the ocean and had the rest of our shoot there.

Absolutely beautiful place. The sunset was just... so pretty.

We took a lot of camwhore pictures. And there were these men who kept leering at me and taking pictures and videos of me in my bikini while I was gathering sea shells. I hate perverted old men. Seriously.

And I got cuts and everything. But it's okay, it was a good experience. Haha.

The boat ride was like a freaking rollercoaster. Yes, it was absolute fun. Lol. The waves were crashing against the boat and all of us were like woah! Haha. I might post some of the videos here in my account soon. Wait for them.

Anyways, I'm tired.

And I miss my Bumbum.

... *sighs*

Labels: bee, chill, hangout, monthsary