Yesterday night, I went to a gay comedy bar with my dad and his siblings. It was fun, although I was too tired to completely enjoy the night.

However...

Today was somewhat of a shock to me.

It all started out as an innocent talk between me and my friend, Nap, about my current predicament. You could say I was paranoid with what was happening around me but anyways, it's not exactly something I would say out loud.

As we went up to the fourth floor towards my first class, I was already thinking and checking out ways into which I would be able to stop my paranoia regarding my situation. Frick damn, though. I couldn't stop.

Then, I found out my ex was still uncomfortable with me.

In my own thoughts and perspective, I don't actually mind being friends with him. Joji isn't that uncomfortable either, or so it would seem. I'm not really sure, though. But yeah, what the hell.

If he doesn't want to be friends with me, so be it. I can't force someone, really.

So anyways, in the course of my day... interesting revelations had surfaced and I was slightly shocked by the fact that... somehow... things weren't what they seem (although I already had an idea before).

Curiouser and curiouser.

Lunch we ate at Shakeys (and gahd, my wallet is now depleted of cash) and afterwards, went to this Derma thing to check out the prices. They were having a discount and we were curious. Surprise, surprise! Vya then got a session and we waited in National Bookstore.

More talk, more laughter, more looking for gifts, and more talk.

But you know... I missed Bee. We never got the chance to spend time together today. Maybe because I was in my own little world and I was unintentionally ignoring him as I stared off into space. You know. My usual "I'm looking at the ceiling, don't bother me" phase.

Ohwells.

I miss those times where I didn't even think. When my mind is in a complete blank.

When I'm together with Bum and it seemed like nothing else mattered.

Haha. Me and my "hopeless romantic" phase again. It's slowly resurfacing, but in a different kind of circumstance.

Maybe I should start being a devoted Catholic again. You know--pray to God and all that.

...

It might help me center myself again. I dunno. Just a thought. :D